Sunday, November 7, 2010

On Silence


I am accustomed to silence. I have been a Quaker for 21 years. We sit joined in silence on Sundays, only occasionally broken by a message someone among us feels moved to share. Not everyone is comfortable with this form of worship. At one time I brought someone to Meeting who fidgeted his way through the hour. He'd been raised a high Episcopalian, and church for him meant somebody else creating an hour full of sound and activity. (Photograph of Amesbury Friends Meeting worship room by Ed Mair.)

At home, we hold hands before meals for a moment of silence, that for me is always filled with blessing and gratitude, and that I usually want to continue for longer than my hungry partner does.

When I walk, I don't listen to music or news through earbuds and I rarely walk and talk with others. While it's not exactly silent, I have the birds and rustling leaves to cushion whatever thoughts might arise out of the quiet solitude. I treasure my long walks out on Labor in Vain Road, a hilly wooded route on a dead-end road whose end opens up to the creek and the salt m
arshes.

Silence is perhaps most valuable when I'm writing, though. I live with someone who is fond of playing music from his large and eclectic CD collection pretty much all the time. We also both like to listen to NPR news and talk shows.

But I find that I have to turn it all off (and ask him to turn the music volume down) when I want to write fiction. I need to hear the characters' voices, to be able to heed their thoughts and intentions. For this, it ha
s to be quiet. Preferably I'm alone in the house, but living with a self-employed person, that doesn't happen very often. I'm fortunate to have a lovely office of my own with doors that close tight, though. And I use them!

What about you? Do you need quiet for your creative endeavors? Do you prefer a bustling noisy surround?

19 comments:

  1. Silence is such an interesting thing. While editing, I need it. While writing, I need something in the background--not sure why. And when I exercise I can go either way, though I find on long runs I need something. As for the Quaker service--that sounds really lovely.

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  2. If I hear another gas powered leaf blower, I should like to scream. Why can't they put some kind of muffler on those things?

    Ever notice how when you turn off the TV a subtle quiet enfolds you? Truly, silence is golden.

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  3. Thanks, Julie. Now that I've used an hour of my precious silence to put up this blog, I need to use the rest of it for writing!

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  4. Indeed, Ray. After I watch a DVD movie on the TV, when it's over I want the damn box off, not switched to a TV show.

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  5. I have always been comfortable with my own silence, many people are not. They must fill their worlds with noise. I seldom watch TV, and IF I feel the need to listen to 'something', that's what audio books are for!

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  6. Lately, I have so many things going on that I crave silence. I also don't find it easily because I, too, have a self-employed person in my house. And while I adore NPR, I find I drive in silence these days to rest my mind and wait for the answers to come. I think at some level, I know I need the quiet to be most creative with my writing and my life. Or perhaps it's because there is so much going on in my head lately that there's no room for any other noise!

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  7. I hear you, Pat! Imagine how quiet it will be a week from tomorrow...

    Thanks for stopping by.

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  8. I live in a semi-rural area in Southern California overlooking the freeway (pretty much anywhere you live in SoCali you're overlooking a freeway)but that isn't the problem. It's just a lovely humming rhythm in the distance. I also hear birds and leaves and that is one of the few, precious FREE things we've been given. However, California is a busy state and constant noise is a part of life which makes silence and sounds of nature so much more precious to me. I like to write in quiet but for me, as you Edith, silence is beyond gold, though I am not a Quaker. Whenever I get those sweet silent moments, I don't write, clean or do anything, I just sit and listen to it. It's so rare and beautiful that is is sometimes too beautiful to bear.

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  9. Fascinating post Edith. I was trying to reply, and discovered that I could not come up with a consistent preference. Sometimes I like it quiet, other times noisy; it seems to be completely situational.

    Two things I don't like *ever* are traffic and upstairs-neighbor-noise (which we have described variously as The Swedish Clog-Dancers Union Meeting, The Bowling Alley, Blind Rhino Mating Rituals, and It's Quite Literally Raining Men from Very Great Heights).

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  10. My husband and I sat in the woods this afternoon with two of our grandchildren. He asked them to listen and tell us what they heard. Lilly heard the hum of traffic from a far away highway. Sophie heard the leaves fall. Priceless.

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  11. Thanks for visiting, Patti, Phil, and Ruth. I love each of your comments. I grew up (well, as far as 5'1") in Temple City, Patti. It was pretty quiet then, although not 'semi-rural' except for the dairy a few blocks away. Phil, have you thought of writing fiction? Or comedy? Ruth, I can't WAIT for grandchildren (and will have to for years, I'm sure). Lovely story.

    I must admit I am amazed, pleased, touched when people actually read this blog and comment. Thank you all!

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  12. Edith, This is a lovely, thoughtful post. I, too, have a great need for silence, especially when I'm writing, because, like you, I need to hear my characters' voices. Like Ray, I loathe the sound of leaf-blowers, and wish they could be banned, as they are in some parts of Southern California, where I grew up. I do listen to music on the radio and the news when I'm in the car, but sometimes on long drives, I just listen to my own thoughts. During periods of living alone, I have sometimes felt the need of the radio for company, but have also wondered about others' need for constant noise. Once had a share in a beach house, where, on one occasion, I was alone with another renter, who had the radio on all the time--even when she left the house. I mean, couldn't she have just listened to the sound of the waves? Same problem with my teenage son--leaves loud music on even when he goes out. Noise seems to be a crutch to some people, and I always find myself wishing they could simply appreciate the silence.

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  13. Edith,
    I've always had this secret desire to be a Quaker and even went to a few meetings in Wellesley -- where I loved the silence. I meditate - so I believe great things happen in silence.

    You project a sort of peaceful composure -- so all this silence is all starting to make sense to me.

    I prefer silence to write, but can deal with a little background noise (from newsroom training).But music or radio is way too distracting!

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  14. I've thought about writing for many years; I keep a little notebook of ideas, interesting words, random phrases, quick character sketches, etc. handy, and I even have several "stubs" written that I've started and then talked myself out of finishing.

    My real talent seems to be writing excuses, so I've been doing that for a while to see where it takes me.

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  15. Silence is essential for me to write. I try to block everything out, but can't. I've never been able to study and listen to music at the same time like a lot of kids did in college. Maybe that means I'm not good at multi-tasking, but then I doubt if those people were good listeners.

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  16. Thanks for dropping in Leslie, Jan, E.B. I appreciate the quiet visit! This post really got some responses.

    Edith

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  17. I find that more and more I crave silence and I especially need it when I am writing. I was a music major and still love listening to (mostly classical) music, but have found that at this time in my life I usually prefer silence even to music.

    I read a beautiful book about it this summer called "A Book of Silence" by Sara Maitland (who is also a writer).

    Thanks for writing about this, Edith. Glad to know there are other lovers of silence out there!

    Nancy Adams

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  18. I can enjoy some classical or jazz piece playing in the background, but can't concentrate on the words I need to write while I'm listening to someone else's words. I enjoy music & singing, so songs with lyrics become too distracting for me.

    I have the same issue with reading. In order for me to fully enjoy a book, I need silence, or at least voices that easily become background noise.

    My boyfriend is the opposite, so when he's working on something, he simply puts in his earbuds & he enjoys his music while I can write in silence.

    A very nice post, Edith.

    Alyx Morgan

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  19. Hi Nancy and Alyx,

    I appreciate your comments. A friend and writer, Michele Dorsey, also recommended on my facebook author page (Edith M. Maxwell) this book: Listening Below the Noise" by Anne LeClaire. More books to check out!

    Hope you'll visit again soon,

    Edith

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